Valkyrie's Aerie

I can do better

Than to wait for Mr. Right

To come sweeping down from his castle

and show me a life full of riches

I can do better

than to stay at home

Playing World of Warcraft all the time

to ease both boredom and lonelinesss

　

Yeah, I'm doing OK, but I think I'm going to have to turn my car back to the finance company. I just can't afford the payments. Or the maintenance. Or the insurance. Not all of them at once anyhow. I do need a vehicle, but I'll probably save up and get something just to run around town in.

I need the money for incidentals such as paying bills and food. Oh, and medicine.

Pet Peeves

Pet Peeve:

Pedestrians that break the law by just walking out in front of my car when I have the right of way. Good thing they don't live in NYC, or they'd have been run over.

Pet Peeve:

People that bend my paperback books spine so that the front and back covers meet.

Pet Peeve:

People that give away the endings of novels or movies I haven't seen yet.

Pet Peeve:

Indeciveness

Me: Where do you want to go for dinner?

You: UH...I don't know.

Me: Red Robin?

You: I dunno.

Me: Old Spaghetti Factory?

You: I dunno
.
Me: Izzy's? (A Pizza and Salad Bar Buffet)

You: I dunno. You decide.

Me: (Silently go ARRRRRGHHHHH!!!!!) Ok. We're going to my mother's for dinner.

You: NOOOOOO!!!! Let's go to Izzy's.

Superman. A man among men. I'm not positive the homo-eroticism was intended in this picture, but boy! Is it there or what? (I am certain, however, there were many repressed gay men back in the early 50's.) I further suppose that a few of them worked for the comic book companies. There is just something about guys-on-guy action that piques my fascination. :)

The more I read of the older comics, the more I am forced to believe that a lot of the writers tried to hide their own sexual leanings--straight, kinky or otherwise-- in their plots. Reed Richards was not good to his woman, or any person with perky boobs for that matter. Jean Grey hung onto Scott's arm... Golden age Lois Lane generally schemed and connived in many a comic to "marry" Superman...(Run, Clark, RUN!!!) Of course, Superman was often a dick to his friends. At least according to this site.

There was generally quite a bit of sexist commentary thrown into mix. Women ONLY wanted to get married and crap out babies. Or wanted new wardrobes. Men? Yeah, they were shown in a bad light too, if I'm being fair. (I do try to be, on occasion.) Reed definitely was a bit on the misogynist side.

Crap. Gotta cut this short before I ramble on!

Lonely Soul

 

It feels good to ease someone's loneliness, to reach out and smooth out the sadness from someone's day. Loneliness isn't an especially painful form of sadness, but long term it really can do tremendous damage. Emotionally, it's hard. It can also take its toll on physical health. People weren't really designed to be alone, no matter how curmudgeonly an individual may be. We all crave affection of some sort

It really can and I should know. Loneliness is pretty insidious, creeps on a person and bites them in the ass.

It's good to help someone. To comfort them and to let them know they can choose to not be alone, even if it is just exchanging a few words on the internet. And, I find, it helps me. I guess it's not entirely altrusitic, then, but very few good deeds are. People always get some undefinable good feeling from helping others.

One of my long lost RPG buddies found me. He's been fairly lonely for awhile, and we've been IM'ing a lot. (Not tonight. Taking a break from that and the writing group.) I got him to join my new roleplaying group and we have been having so much fun, it should be illegal. After 3 and a half years, it felt as if we clicked together and that we'd never taken a writing break.

As for my own personal writing, I have been writing quite a bit. About 3 pages every day, but just haven't had the energy to do quality blogging. Between my writing group, World of Warcraft, and work, sometimes I don't feel like spilling my guts via blog. Ok, too much so lately. I do miss it.

And I do miss reading everyone's quirky comments!

Special Report on RNN--- When Good Staplers Go Bad

About noon today, a young woman was working quietly at her desk, stapling papers when the assailant, her previously faithful stapler, cruelly and maliciously bit down into the tender flesh between her index finger and thumb.

She howled in pain, attracting the attention of her co-workers and the stapler fell to the floor, presumably in an effort to escape. It was no use as the woman, who prefers to remain unnamed, wrestled it and put it in her top desk drawer, where it remains incarcerated while awaiting sentencing.

The victim wants to give her accused attacker this message. "I hope you get what you deserve in jail!"

Does the attack of the stapler mean other office equipment will revolt as well? I shudder to think what will happen to us all if faxes, computers and scissors decide to free themselves from the domination of man.

Taken Entirely Out of Consext

Get it? Context?  Consext?  Oh! Why do I bother?

Life For Rent

But if my life is for rent and I don't learn to buy
Well, I deserve nothing more than I get
Cause nothing I have is truly mine --Dido

How do you learn to buy your own life when you have to put water on your cereal because milk is too expensive? (Only reason I have this site is because I prepaid for it before my household finances went down the crapper.)

Or is buying my own life more of a metaphor, of taking responsibility of my own happiness? Of making sure I get what I need, not necessarily what I want?

Things that make me go hmmm...

Struggling

(I wrote this a long time ago for another blog.  I am still battling depression and the nasty self loathing thoughts I get from time to time.  Please bare with me.) 

Homosexuality is not synonymous with promiscuity. Yes, there are promiscuous homosexuals just as there are horny straight people. The promiscuity itself is dangerous and destructive, not the homosexual ‘behavior’.

I am not a lesbian, but I am bi. The next time I sleep with someone, (I’ve only had one sort -of- lover.) it will be because I love them. I think sex is something that should be shared and talked about privately. I’m actually conservative about ‘sex’.

I’ve known gay couples in ten-twenty year relationships, completely faithful to each other...and they are happy. I’ve known heteros in five year relationships, and it is destructive because one or the other has cheated. It depends on the individual.

What is destructive to our society is....people being forced to have unwanted babies. Destructive is people not respecting (note: respecting is NOT worshiping) our environment. Destructive is the lack of health care for poor people, especially women. Don’t talk to me about outsourcing jobs; our company decided to outsource ALL IT positions to India. That may save the company a few buckaroos, but 59 people got laid off. I’m not sure how I feel about it. I'm not sure if it is harming our country or not. Lack of info.

But I stray from the original topic.

Gays and lesbians do not act like the Gideons, lurking outside playgrounds handing out literature, hoping to recruit kids. I will, however, defend my right to love who I want to.

For the longest time, I would have done anything for a taste of love and acceptance in my life. Just a taste of someone gentle and kind. But more and more, I am realizing that love and acceptance of me...has to come from me and not an external source. 

I’m a lot happier being agnostic than I ever was being a Lutheran.

I debated about talking about this on my blog. Not out of shame, but because I wasn't expected it to still hurt. It does. It makes me uncomfortable. I feel like a wuss.

A few days ago, I ran into the asshole that raped me. He was coming out of a courthouse. No, I don't know why he was there. Yes, I was curious about that...curious in that morbid sort of way that you know isn't good for you, but you can't help it.

I was stunned. Our eyes met. I felt nauseous and scared. Long forgotten memories kicked me in the heart. I just....felt horrible. We were seperated by a bunch of people. I am not sure he recognized me, but I recognized him. I would know that face...that ugly face with a horrible soul anywhere. I just about threw up, unsure whether it would have been from terror or disgust--possibly both--on the sidewalk. I hurried up to my bus stop and stayed with the "friends" I had made. I didn't see him again.

I'll tell you guys....although I did file a report with the police, I never followed through when I found he had gang connections. I wussed out. I said before that I didn't know why he was there, but if he was there for some sort of sexual assault, and I find out about it, I will be sick to my stomach. I will be kicking my own ass for quite some time. I could have saved someone from rape...IF I had stayed strong.

A Tender Moment...